Forgive and Forget

The question I am asked most often after I teach on forgiveness is, “Are we supposed to forgive and forget?” In other words, if I forgive someone who hurt me, must I, also, get close to them again and risk being hurt by them again?

When we forgive, we don’t forget. Here’s why. Forgiveness is not acting like the offense never happened. To forgive someone is to acknowledge that the offense did happen, and to, then, release them from the consequences of their offense. It is to no longer hold them in contempt for their treatment of you. To forgive them is to absorb the pain of their offense without insisting that they must pay. To forgive, you let the matter end with you instead of perpetuating the hurt by constantly telling the story of their offense, wishing them harm or bringing them harm.

Forgiveness is given freely. We forgive because we were forgiven. (Colossians 2:13-14 And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross.) Jesus cancelled the debt by taking the consequences of our offense on himself. We forgive because this is God’s command to us. (Ephesians 4:32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.) We are to forgive as we have been forgiven.

While forgiveness is given freely, trust is earned. To trust someone is to open up to them. Each person determines how closely they allow people to get to them. We all have differing emotional boundaries and personal space. As trust builds, people are allowed to be closer, both physically and emotionally. Once a person is hurt, their “generally allowed, personal space” is adjusted. The rules change about their “generally allowed, personal space”. The offender is no longer trusted, so he is not allowed to be as close as before. Jesus practiced boundaries with people by withdrawing from them. He withdrew from those who would make him king. He withdrew from the religious people who threatened to kill him. He withdrew from the crowds who made unrealistic demands on him.

I can forgive and still have boundaries. I can forgive my brother for hitting me and still not stand so close to him that he can hit me again. I can really forgive him. I might have no thoughts of revenge or hate for him. But forgiving does not mean I must stand closer to him. Trust, which is earned, is what gives me the faith to stand closer to him.

We must learn to disassociate forgiving someone from trusting them. Forgiving does not require that you trust them again. It’s only wise to forgive. It’s not always wise to trust.

We forgive, but we don’t forget. Healthy people live with boundaries.

Connecting to the Kingdom

Jesus never calls people to come to church, he invites them to enter the Kingdom of God – a relationship that begins today through faith in Jesus and lasts forever in a community of people where God is glorified and his will is done. People who live in the Kingdom of God have undergone a radical transformation because the good news of Jesus’ death and resurrection has changed their hearts. Jesus teaches that the Kingdom of God is a radical place where people would rather serve than be served. It is a radical place where people would rather live together celebrating redemption in Jesus than to live alone, just coping with everyday life.

So, sometimes I wonder what people think when they hear us talking on Sunday mornings about the most practical expressions of doing life together as the body of Christ – we call it living in community. We talk about being in a small group and finding a place to serve at CCCC as basic expressions of living in this community of God’s people. I wonder what people are thinking because I know that only about half the people who attend CCCC are in a small group and much less than that, maybe one fourth, are regularly serving.

Why is that? Is it because we aren’t inspiring speakers? Is it because people are still new to church and they are just trying to figure out what they believe about God before they jump into the “community”? Maybe.
I think both of those reasons are true for a few people, but not very many.

I think the real bottom line for people who regularly attend CCCC who aren’t in group and don’t serve is that they just don’t really understand what Jesus is talking about when he describes what it’s like to live in the Kingdom of God. I think people see church as just a part of living in this world – like going to work or to the grocery or to a baseball game. I think people think that they can “know” God without being intimate with his people and intimately involved with his mission. I just don’t think that’s true.

Jesus’ description of the Kingdom of Heaven is one of mutual submission, sacrifice, service, and interdependence among the people who live there.

Matthew 20:26-28 But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

The next time you hear us challenge you to fulfill your CC2.0 commitments to give, serve, go to small group, and invite people to church; or the next time we invite you to GroupLink or First Serve; or the next time we invite you to come to The Gathering and share the Lord’s Supper with this community of faith, I hope you’ll come. Not because I asked you to, but because you decide to risk a greater exposure to the transformational power of the gospel of Jesus and because you’re ready to trade life in the suburbs for life in the Kingdom of God.

The Blessings of CHLTB

I was inspired yesterday watching over a thousand people putting others’ interests before their own as they gave up their Sunday afternoon and served the community by performing landscaping, painting and cleaning projects for Clear View Education Center and McWhirter Elementary School. The first Church Has Left The Building effort by Clear Creek Community Church was a huge success! We not only accomplished a great deal of work in about 2 ½ hours but had FUN doing it. The servant attitude of each person was contagious. As I walked around thanking those participating, a common response was “No, thanks for the opportunity.” God has blessed CCCC with hundreds of people who are interested in sharing the Gospel with our community by serving in our community. May our good deeds open up doors for the Good News!

We lived these scriptures yesterday:

1 Peter 4:10

As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace

Philippians 2:3-5
Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,

Way to go, CCCC!

Here are some photos from yesterday.
Click on the image for a higher resolution.

Tim Keller's "The Prodigal God"

There are fewer teachers I enjoy right now than Timothy Keller, pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in New York City. He is brilliant, engaging and incredibly accessible. Not only did he give one of the best conference messages I have heard in quite a while, he has also authored two books which have very few peers. I read his first book, The Reason for God, last year and was astounded at how good it was at helping people deal with the questions that usually pop up from those skeptical of God. His latest book, The Prodigal God, is a book-version of his sermon series on Jesus’ parable in Luke 15 popularly known as The Prodigal Son.

Of the many things that makes Keller special is his ability to skillfully get to the core issue at hand - the Gospel. In the world that is Christianity, Inc. much of what passes as solid biblical teaching is nothing more than moralism with a little Jesus sprinkled here and there. It’s funny (in a very sad way) that many have left the penalty of the Law to embrace the grace offered in Jesus only to create new laws in order to make us feel better about our performance before a God who has already performed for us. Instead of letting Christianity become a freeing grace from God it gets turned into oppressive, soul-crushing religion. This won’t do and Keller is one of the best voices to help us see what a Gospel-centered life can look like.

The Prodigal God is his latest attempt to bring people out of the clutches of religion into the Gospel of grace. The book is brief (only 132 pages) yet totally enthralling as it breaks down the relationship a father in the Ancient Near East would have with his sons giving us a deeper appreciation not only for what truly was transpiring in the parable but also the greatness of the Gospel. I won’t say anymore. Read it for yourself. I read The Prodigal God in January and may have already read the best book of the year.

Yes. It’s that good.

***This was adapted from a past post from Teaching Pastor Yancey Arrington's website

Religious or Christian?

What is the difference between being a Christian and being religious? Aren’t devout Christians religious people? Yes and no.

When you talk about religion as any type of spiritual pursuit, Christians might be considered religious. But religion is often considered what man does to reach out to God. To better understand the affects of religion, be sure to hear “Why God Hates Religion” beginning April 19, 2009 at the Egret Bay Campus.

In Christianity, it’s not about man reaching to God, but it’s about God reaching to man. God came to us in Jesus Christ. (John 1:1, 14) He showed us what he is like. He loved us first. (1 John 4:19) He sought us first. He provided a way of forgiveness through Jesus’ taking our sin on the cross. He offered us hope.

The Christian faith is founded on the belief that man’s best efforts cannot make a person acceptable to God. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:23) While religion says that good people go to heaven and bad people don’t, Christianity says that all are sinners and so only bad people go to heaven. Yes, you read that correctly. Only bad people go to heaven. But the bad people who go to heaven (remember, we have all sinned) have been forgiven and accepted by God when they placed their faith in Jesus.

So does religion make you right with God? Only Jesus paying your sin debt and making you a child of God makes you acceptable to God. And when you have faith in Jesus, you are completely accepted and Jesus makes you completely acceptable to God. All of your sins are forgiven. You bear the guilt and shame of your sins no more. The Bible uses words like, you are “justified” and you are made “righteous.” You become the “children of God.” You have peace with God.

The Bible teaches that man connects with God by grace through faith. (Ephesians 2:8-9) Grace means “God’s unmerited favor.” So you are made right with God, not based on religious deeds (church going, giving, baptism, serving the poor). Rather, you are made right with God when you depend completely on what Jesus Christ did for you when he paid your sin debt on the cross and demonstrated his power over death and hell in the resurrection.

So you receive this gift of grace from God when you place your trust in Jesus alone to make you right with God. You place your trust in Jesus by calling on the name of the Lord to be saved (Romans 10:13). The only way to call is to pray. Billy Graham encourages people to pray the following prayer as they come to faith in Jesus.

Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner and need Your forgiveness. I believe in who You are and that You died for my sins. I want to turn from my sins. I now invite You to come into my heart and life. I want to trust and follow You as Lord and Savior. In Jesus' name. Amen.

When you place your faith in Jesus, be sure to tell someone who will be happy for you. You’ll want to be baptized and get involved in a local church. If you have questions or if you prayed to receive Christ, please e-mail us at mystory@clearcreek.org .

God wants you to become a fully devoted follower of Jesus Christ. That does not happen overnight. And you should not try to do this alone. You will grow the best in community. That’s why we have small groups. In a small group you will make some friends of people who have the same spiritual goal as yourself, to follow Jesus Christ. You can get in a small group by registering for GroupLink.

When you feel the need to investigate or understand more before you place your faith in Jesus, focus your questions and investigative energy on Jesus Christ. The crux of the matter is “Who is Jesus?” Let us help you in the journey. You might want to be part of Starting Point. A small group study intended for spiritual seekers to have a safe place to investigate the Christian faith and ask questions. Starting Point groups meet in the church office on Sunday mornings at 9:45AM-11AM and 11:15AM-12:30PM. You can register for Starting Point through GroupLink. For more information, go to the Connection Corner on Sundays.

Holy Week Readings - Easter Sunday

Read this Gospel account of what happened on Easter Morning: John 20:1-18

¹ Now on the first day of the week Mary Magdalene came to the tomb early, while it was still dark, and saw that the stone had been taken away from the tomb. ²So she ran and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him." ³ So Peter went out with the other disciple, and they were going toward the tomb. ⁴Both of them were running together, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. ⁵And stooping to look in, he saw the linen cloths lying there, but he did not go in. ⁶Then Simon Peter came, following him, and went into the tomb. He saw the linen cloths lying there, ⁷and the face cloth, which had been on Jesus’ head, not lying with the linen cloths but folded up in a place by itself. ⁸Then the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed; ⁹for as yet they did not understand the Scripture, that he must rise from the dead. ¹⁰Then the disciples went back to their homes.

¹¹But Mary stood weeping outside the tomb, and as she wept she stooped to look into the tomb. ¹²And she saw two angels in white, sitting where the body of Jesus had lain, one at the head and one at the feet. ¹³They said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" She said to them, "They have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid him." ¹⁴Having said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing, but she did not know that it was Jesus. ¹⁵Jesus said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?" Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away." ¹⁶Jesus said to her, "Mary." She turned and said to him in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means Teacher). ¹⁷Jesus said to her, "Do not cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to my brothers and say to them, 'I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.'" ¹⁸Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, "I have seen the Lord"—and that he had said these things to her.

He is Risen!
He is Risen Indeed!

Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version.
©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Holy Week Readings - Holy Saturday

As we parallel Holy Week, Jesus' body lies dead in the tomb. Take time throughout the day to reflect on this sobering and priceless truth.

Read Matthew 27:57-66- Jesus is buried

⁵⁷ When it was evening, there came a rich man from Arimathea, named Joseph, who also was a disciple of Jesus. ⁵⁸He went to Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus. Then Pilate ordered it to be given to him. ⁵⁹And Joseph took the body and wrapped it in a clean linen shroud ⁶⁰and laid it in his own new tomb, which he had cut in the rock. And he rolled a great stone to the entrance of the tomb and went away. ⁶¹Mary Magdalene and the other Mary were there, sitting opposite the tomb.

⁶²The next day, that is, after the day of Preparation, the chief priests and the Pharisees gathered before Pilate ⁶³and said, "Sir, we remember how that impostor said, while he was still alive, 'After three days I will rise.' ⁶⁴Therefore order the tomb to be made secure until the third day, lest his disciples go and steal him away and tell the people, 'He has risen from the dead,' and the last fraud will be worse than the first." ⁶⁵Pilate said to them, "You have a guard of soldiers. Go, make it as secure as you can." ⁶⁶So they went and made the tomb secure by sealing the stone and setting a guard.

OR read John 19:38-42 - Jesus is buried

³⁸ After these things Joseph of Arimathea, who was a disciple of Jesus, but secretly for fear of the Jews, asked Pilate that he might take away the body of Jesus, and Pilate gave him permission. So he came and took away his body. ³⁹ Nicodemus also, who earlier had come to Jesus by night, came bringing a mixture of myrrh and aloes, about seventy-five pounds in weight. ⁴⁰So they took the body of Jesus and bound it in linen cloths with the spices, as is the burial custom of the Jews. ⁴¹Now in the place where he was crucified there was a garden, and in the garden a new tomb in which no one had yet been laid. ⁴²So because of the Jewish day of Preparation, since the tomb was close at hand, they laid Jesus there.

Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version.
©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
Used by permission. All rights reserved.